Zhangjiajie

Two weekends ago (sorry I write slow) was the first time I've left Guilin on my own free will since I've been here (the others being visa runs). The destination of this trip was Zhangjiajie National Forest park in the northwestern part of
Hunan Province  (the province right above Guangxi). I had Monday off from school due to the Dragon Boat Festival so I figured it would be a good weekend for a change of scenery. I had been getting a little stir crazy from my daily routine here, so I figured missing out on a unique cultural event to go somewhere less populated and stare at some crazy looking landforms was a sacrifice I was willing to make. While Zhangjiajie has always been popular in China (it is the country's first national park) it has recently received worldwide recognition due to the movie Avatar (which I admit I haven't seen). The landscape of the alien planet, Pandora, was inspired by the landscape of Zhangjiajie. Adding to its impressive resume, it is also recognized as a UNESCO World Heritage Site. Needless to say, I was pretty excited for this trip. I also had two friends travelling with me...a new experience thus far.

Zhangjiajie is pretty far away and would require an overnight train to get there; therefore, our plan was to leave in the late afternoon on Friday and arrive early Saturday morning. We would then, after checking into our hostel, spend all day Saturday and Sunday at the park before leaving Sunday night. My Mom once told me that my thoughts going into a trip are just as important as the ones at the end, so, after we boarded the train, I took some time to jot a few of them down. In no particular order:

-Good God there's a lot of people in this country
-I hope the Xinjiang seperatists are on a bye week
-Hey, at least we're moving away from Thailand
-Southeast Asia certainly seems to be quite the powderkeg these days
-Melatonin or Baijiu?
-The countryside outside of Guilin is pretty spectacular, I should take more time to appreciate it
-I still can't get over how many people are in this country
-It better be colder in Zhangjiajie than Guilin (When considering the current weather in Guilin the phrase "hot as balls" comes to mind. Not only is it already in the 90s but the humidity is about 10,000% right now...brutal)

The hard sleeper section of our train was a bit dirtier than the trains I have been on in the past; but I figured that if that was the only part of the trip to complain about then I was in pretty good shape. I also had more reason not to complain considering that one of my friends wouldn't even have a bed to sleep on for the entire ride. Because we reserved our tickets so late, there were only two beds left with the rest of the vacant spots being essentially coach-level airplane seats. Knowing that there was somebody in my group that was in a significantly worse situation than myself made me feel a lot better...not the kindest sentiment I've ever had, but true nonetheless (plus we made it up to him by giving him the nicer of the two rooms we booked in our hostel). Our trip went by without incident (well...except for the joker who decided to lay down and fall asleep in my bed while I was hanging out with my friend in another car, but that issue was quickly resolved) and we arrived in the city of Zhangjiajie around 8 the next morning.

Once I stepped off the train, I noticed two things simultaneously:

1) It is much cooler in this place...thank God.
2) Is that fresh air I'm breathing? Yea, I think it is.

Despite being tired, I was already in a good mood as we headed to our hostel to check in. After we checked in, we changed and set off to find a ride into the park. Zhangjiajie is a fairly touristy area, so it wasn't hard to find someone willing to take us there. Standing in the middle of the city, it was hard to believe that we were anywhere close to one of the most famous natural landscapes in the country. There were some cool mountains but nothing I hadn't seen before. The cab driver spoke a rough dialect of Chinese, which, when combined with our limited language skills, left me wondering if we were indeed going to the right place. It was also quite foggy so there wasn't much visibility; however, during the 40 minute drive from the center of the city to the park, the landscape kept getting crazier which told me that we were heading in the right direction (any doubts I had were quickly put to rest when we began seeing Avatar movie signs for what felt like every other mile). Soon enough we arrived at the entrance of the park, bought our day passes, and walked in.

This park is enormous and it's not uncommon for people who visit to stay for a week. Since we would only have two days, we made it our mission to see as much of the area as we could, while also accepting that we wouldn't be able to see all of it. To make it easier to navigate, we decided that we should begin at the highest point and work our way down. In order to get there we took a bus up the mountain which then dropped us of at a station where we would take a gondola to the top. I was really excited to take the gondola but, after being on it for about five minutes, it soon became apparent to me that this was not the best day to take one. The weather that morning was really foggy so, once the gondola reached a height were we would theoretically be able to see all of the cool formations, we found ourselves literally stuck in the clouds. We couldn't see a damn thing, only whiteness. The visibility was so low that the station at the top of the mountain appeared out of nowhere and took us by surprise. We disembarked, walked around, and noticed that there was nobody up there, and for good reason. There was nothing to see. The fog was too heavy. At this point I started to become a bit agitated. As I walked around, I began hearing a voice in the back of my mind saying "Shit Jay, did you really just spend all that time and money to come up here to see this??" I didn't say any of this out loud, but something tells me that I was not the only person in the group feeling this way.

Behind me there is chaos

We quickly found a bus that would take us to another site. Due to the limited visibility, I was a little bit nervous about boarding the bus but at that point we really had no other option. We set off down the road and eventually the fog dissipated (this wasn't a gradual phase out, it was just one minute we couldn't see anything and then all of the sudden the clouds were gone). Cool, maybe we'll be able to see some stuff after all. The bus arrived at another site and we set off once again. Because the fog prevented some places from being visited, the areas where there actually was visibility, I figured, would have heavier tourist traffic than usual. Once we arrived at the scenic areas we realized that this was indeed the case. I've written before about how the concept of forming a line isn't something that is observed here and this place was no different. We were able to get some pretty cool pictures, but what these pictures don't show are the masses of people behind us pushing and boxing each other out all in effort to get to the front so that they can get a picture of themselves holding up a peace sign while standing in front of a rock.

QUICK ASIDE: Seriously, what is up with that? Why do Chinese people feel the need to hold up a peace sign in EVERY. SINGLE. PICTURE? I guess this is better than all those fake-tough white boys holding up gang signs while drunk at a party, but still, let's try to diversify a bit.

The sheer volume of tourists was gradually eroding our experience and we weren't sure where to go from there. Our luck soon changed when we came across a small stone path that was leading down the mountain. The path was pretty steep and wet so nobody was walking on it. We wanted to go to an area where there weren't so many people so we decided to go all Robert Frost on the situation and take the road less traveled. And guess what? It did make all the difference. The path took us to some clearings where we had great vantage points of the spires erupting out of the valley floor. As we continued on, the path began to get much more technical and we soon found ourselves climbing. We weren't sure where we were going but curiosity and hatred for large tourist groups spurred us onward. When we reached the end of the climb we found ourselves on top on one of the spires, Hell yea. This was the best view we had gotten all day, and what was even better is that we didn't have to share it with anybody. The several cigarette butts we saw strewn sporadically across the rock told us that we were not the first people to find this place; but at that moment, this space was ours. We even combined our first names (Jay, Michael, and Samir) to give the place its own name (Jamiracle rock). Aren't we creative?

Finding Jamiracle rock gave our trip the shot in the arm that it had been searching for up to that point. While standing on the edge we saw a large, traditional-looking building off in the distance. We decided that that would be our next destination. going back up was obviously a bit more difficult than going down, but we went beast mode and got it done. We found a path that would

take us over to the building and set off again. When we arrived at the building we found ourselves face to face.........with a McDonald's.

A McDonald's??? Are you F-ing kidding me? This was like a big middle finger to, not just the natural beauty of the place, but the overall culture behind exploring a national park. I couldn't believe it, corporate America had successfully infiltrated one of the most remote areas I have ever been. Ridiculous. Now........having said all that, did I eat there? Hell yea I did, I went to town. McDonald's is awesome and I wasn't in any mood to eat any of that local overpriced bullshit (I realize that people like me are part of the problem and not the solution). After a delicious lunch that consisted of a cheeseburger, fries, chicken nuggets, soda, and ice cream (and yes, I enjoyed every second of it while also realizing the hypocrisy of my actions) we set out again. We decided to get on the first bus we saw even though we didn't know where it would take us. This bus took us to another site on a different side of the park. The place where we got of proclaimed itself as being home to "The First Bridge in the World" (I'm not sure how official this title is but I'm sure it has been there for quite a while). At this point in the day the fog was gone, and there was even a little bit of sun. Even though there were a lot of people at this site as well, it felt less chaotic. We we got on a path which took us along the edges of the cliffs and gave us a great view

of just how dizzyingly high up we were.

I haven't done a good job so far in describing just how cool this place was. When I was much younger I was fortunate enough to see the Grand Canyon in person (I highly recommend doing that if you haven't already) and was absolutely blown away, so much so that that feeling has stuck with me more than a decade later. The reason I'm telling you this now is because since that trip all those years ago I have been lucky enough to see many cool things, but nothing has given me that same sense of wonder until I saw this place. Seeing these enormous formations shooting out of the ground towards the sky like rockets didn't make me feel like I was in another country, but another planet (Pandora perhaps?). We walked around for another two hours before we decided to call it a day.

Even though we decided that it was time to head back, we weren't exactly sure how to do that. We asked one of the park representatives what the quickest way to get back to the main gate was. She told us to take another bus to the site of "The Tallest Elevator in the World" (I think that title is actually official) and buy a ticket to ride it down. This felt like a money trap but we didn't really care. Apparently this elevator is a pretty big tourist draw so we figured we might as well check it out. When we got to the elevator I realized that this was the second most egregious example of overtouristization (yes, I made that word up) in the park besides the McDonald's (and we patronized both of them). Built into the side of an enormous cliff were two glass elevator shafts with buses at the bottom shuttling people back and forth. While the concept of the world's tallest elevator sounded intriguing at first, it became significantly less cool when I got on and realized that the ride was just that...an elevator (They even played elevator music for God's sake). Easily the most anticlimactic ten minutes of the day. Eventually we made it to the bottom where we got on another bus that took us to the front gate of the park. We then found a cab to take us back into town. We made plans to wake up early on Sunday so that we could get a lot of hiking time in so Saturday night was pretty uneventful.

While I certainly enjoyed our day on Saturday, what we did on Sunday will be what I remember the most years from now. The site of our adventure was Tianmenshan (translated as Heaven's Gate Mountain). While this mountain doesn't have anything to do with Avatar, it's spectacular in its own right. Overlooking the city of Zhangjiajie, it's easy to see why it's called Heaven's Gate. This area also made headlines in the extreme sports community in October 2013 when a large crowd of people watched as Hungarian wingsuit BASE jumper, Victor Kovats exploded himself at the base of the mountain after a parachute malfunction (sorry if I sound irreverent about it but that is essentially what happened). In lighter news, Tianmen mountain also made this list on The Chive.

Above the clouds

In order to get to the top, we would have to take another gondola. This one would begin in the middle of the city. Once again, the first few minutes of the ride was pretty cool before we ran into clouds. "Not again," I told myself, but then, something happened that I didn't expect...we rose above the clouds and the mountain was continuing upward. The Chinese tourists that shared the gondola with began shouting out in amazement. While I didn't make any noise myself, I think I shared the same feeling. The mist surrounding the mountain added to its celestial feel. We eventually made it to the top and found an observation tower where we took some more pictures. After that, we followed signs that directing us to a cliff walk. These signs took us to an area called the "Guigu Cliffs." The walk along these cliffs was the most

memorable part for me. The extreme height combined with the sheer drop of the cliff face was shocking. The path and the railings appeared to be structurally sound but I have a mild fear of heights which caused me to become a bit anxious. Still, I was determined not to let that affect my day so we pressed on. Eventually we came to a point on the path where a small skywalk jutted out over the abyss. I wasn't too excited at the thought of walking out there but I knew that I needed to do it. I took a couple of steps when,

The cliffs (the walkway is visible at the top)

all of the sudden, a large group of Chinese tourists in search of a new place to hold up a peace sign got on as well and began the whole boxing out routine. This was not a place to be testing weight limits or brushing up against people so I immediately hopped off and continued up the path. I took many pictures of this area but none of them were able to capture just how high up we were.

After the cliff walk was over, we had time to go see one more site. The next area was at a lower elevation with no direct route from our current location. In order to get there we would have to take a gondola back down below the clouds and then take a bus back up. The bus ride was pretty sketchy. The driver clearly knew what he was doing and he wasn't taking any unnecessary risks but there are just some places in the world that just aren't meant for roads. This road wound its way up the mountain along the edge of some pretty far drops. To add to the danger, the presence of the clouds made the surface of the road wet. We finally made it to our destination where we are confronted with a very long and steep staircase that makes its way up the mountain and stops at an enormous natural arch. We agree at the bottom that we would each go at our own pace and that we would just see each other at the top.

From the bottom, the steps looked pretty steep but, as I made my way up, I realized that they were

even steeper than I thought. Towards the top the steps in front of me were nearly level with my chest. If I was a bigger douche I could talk about how climbing those steps on a mountain called "Heaven's Gate" was a metaphor for life or chasing your dreams or some other bullshit; but I won't. I did, however, feel a sense of accomplishment when I reached the top...that is until I looked next to me and saw a middle aged woman standing there in high heels; I guess the lesson for the day is that some people like to make things unnecessarily hard on themselves. Still, if those heels could talk they would've said "Sit down Jay, you're nothing special for making it up here." We hung out at the top long enough to rest and take some more pictures before beginning our final descent down the mountain to the train station and back home.

On the final bus ride down the mountain I allowed myself to become more introspective about the whole experience.There are some situations here that, due to the fact that I am so far away from home, causes me to exaggerate my emotions toward them (Just adding the two words "In China" at the end of a sentence can make things sound crazier or more different than they actually are. Ex: "I climbed a mountain IN CHINA." "I went to a bar IN CHINA." "I rode a train IN CHINA"), but this was not one of those situations. This place was so unique and wild that I cannot possibly overstate it. The fact that it is in another country is just gravy after that. While my life over the past four months hasn't always been easy or fun it's experiences like this one that humble me and make me look at the bigger picture and realize how lucky I am. The world is an enormous place and I haven't even begun to scratch the surface when it comes to seeing everything there is to see; but, doing things like this makes me feel as though I am chipping away. Although I was physically exhausted when I returned to Guilin I was mentally rejuvenated.

"Going Native" Experience of the Week

It has been awhile since my last post so for this one I have two:

1) My school was nice enough to buy me a cake on my birthday which I took home...only to realize that I don't own a fork.

Let's do this

2) This past Sunday I went with my boss and her family to an area right outside of Guilin called Daxu. We planned on checking the place out a bit before grabbing some lunch. Daxu is a small area located along a river with two villages on either side. I wasn't aware of this going into the outing, but we were arriving on a special day. Once every ten years these two villages have a festival of sorts that serves as a symbol of their friendship. This festival included a dragon dance, boat races, and a large meal. There are many touristy places around here where I feel that the local people try to play up the traditional culture only to attract tourists, which can make things feel a bit contrived and fake. This experience actually felt legit and I was honored to be able to see it.

Funny Sign of the Week

A consistent source of entertainment for me here is seeing all of the people walking around wearing shirts with English words or phrases and having no clue what they mean. This leads to people wearing shirts like these:

The thing about it is that I know the Chinese could just as easily turn it around on westerners and make fun of all the people who get tattoos of Chinese characters without knowing what they say so I don't feel bad about laughing at this. This isn't even the funniest shirt I've seen. Over the past few weeks I've seen not one but two different people wearing a shirt that said "Pervert." Another time I saw someone wearing a shirt that just said "Student Loans."

Reason Why I Like This Place

I'll be able to watch the World Cup!

Random Tangent

This is a question that my Dad and I often debate and we still haven't come up with an answer so I would like to open it up to a wider audience and see if anybody can help us out:

Why is this man famous?

I'm intentionally not going to say who he is because I know that most of you will already know. But, after seeing him sing in the opening ceremony for the World Cup next to Jennifer Lopez and a slew of other sexy Brazilian girls I felt the need to reopen this discussion. It is clear to me that this man has hit the jackpot and probably lives a life that is much cooler than mine will ever be; what isn't so clear though is what he's done to get to this point. If you have any insight into this feel free to comment below.

Hong Kong Part 2/Shenzhen Airport Riot

This past weekend I had to make my second trip in 30 days to Hong Kong to renew my visa. My experience this weekend went from being one of the best experiences of my life to one of the worst within 24 hours. Let's recap.

Because my last trip lasted about 45 minutes I had asked my boss if it was OK that I took a little bit more time to actually visit Hong Kong this time around. She was kind enough to agree so I planned on taking the train down there on Thursday night and arriving around noon on Friday, then flying home on Sunday night in order to be back for school on Monday. My parents' friends in Hong Kong were in Barcelona for the weekend but were kind enough to allow me to stay at their apartment. Also, in the days leading up to my trip I was informed that the Hong Kong Sevens rugby tournament was going to be in town. For those of you who haven't heard of it, the Sevens is an international tournament that has become a mecca for rugby fans across the world. The scene in Hong Kong that weekend would be like if you combined the World Cup with Mardi Gras and condensed it into three days. Needless to say I was pumped. My Dad had gone to this tournament with his friends when we lived in Taiwan and had always talked about how it was one of the funnest experiences of his life, now I would be able to see it for myself.

As I set out for the train station on Thursday night I already felt like a veteran for this trip. I again had the hard sleeper, but I knew the drill this time and managed to get a decent night's sleep. I arrived in Hong Kong around 1 PM on Friday and made my way to the neighborhood of Happy Valley, the location of the apartment. When I arrived at my accommodations I was blown away. I was treated to a plush apartment which overlooked a horse track and had a great view of the Hong Kong skyline, certainly a step up from how I've been living these past few months. Oftentimes, living in Guilin, it has been tough for me to imagine what exactly my endgame is, so being in this apartment was great for me because it gave me a specific lifestyle to aspire to. The apartment was also very close to the stadium where the Sevens was being played so, after I settled in, I set out to try to find tickets. I was told that Friday, because it was the preliminary round, would be the cheapest day to find tickets from scalpers. Realizing that this was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, I decided that I would do whatever it took to get myself inside the stadium. One of the aspects of this tournament that makes it such a party is the tradition of groups of people attending the matches wearing outlandish costumes. I wasn't exactly sure where the stadium was but I saw a group of about 15 people walking down the street wearing tuxedos and helmets like Daft Punk so I figured that they were most likely heading to where I wanted to go. I followed them and soon began hearing the noise from the stadium. As I got closer I began to see scalpers and I was able to buy a ticket for about 60 US, a pretty good bargain.

Hell yea

When I got inside the stadium I immediately went to the ATM. As I stood in line, I heard some Australian guy dressed as Elvis saying that he had saved up months' worth of paychecks to be here this weekend. I couldn't believe how lucky I was to have stumbled upon a scene that many people have on their bucket lists. After I got my money, I made a pit stop at the concession stand where it soon became abundantly clear to me why Mr. Elvis had saved up so much money to be there. At the very cheapest is was about 12 US for a 12 oz of Carlsburg draught. Food was about the same. Going from a place where I could easily live on 30 U.S. a week to a place where that would maybe buy me one meal was quite a change of scenery. I saw that buying Carlsburg by the liter would only be about 3 US more so I decided that it would be more economical for me to go that direction, a very mature decision on my part (that was sarcasm, in case you didn't pick that up). After the concessions, I made my way to the famed South Stands. This is where I was told the loudest, drunkest, craziest fans would be. I didn't necessarily want to become one of them but I certainly wanted to take in the scene. I had gotten there early so good seats were easy to find, but as the night wore on the stands began getting packed. The costumes were hilarious. I sat down next to a group of people dressed as Spiderman with the Flintstones sitting behind me and the grim reaper sitting next to them. There were guys dressed up as playboy bunnies, mexican banditos, and sumo wrestlers. Let me say that this wasn't the first sporting event I had been to outside of the U.S.. My soccer fanhood has brought me to England and Brazil to see matches; but, While those matches were

exhilarating for me, the mood in the stands wasn't nearly as positive. The fans at those matches were very passionate but there was also a very tangible hatred for fans of the other teams. The Hong Kong Sevens was a much happier, partylike atmosphere. There was good-natured trash talk between people from other countries but everybody just seemed happy to be there. I ended up sitting next to some British guys who were giving me a hard time because I couldn't name a single player on the U.S. squad (calling me a "shit" American) but even they celebrated and gave me high fives when the U.S. scored. The only truly negative reaction I saw was when the Russian squad took the field, a man draped in the Ukrainian flag with about 4 beer treys perched on his head began booing loudly, pretty understandable. Many people throughout the stadium joined him (the U.S. got the second most boos but that's to be expected). While I still think American football players are far superior athletes (There's nobody that can convince me that Patrick Willis wouldn't be the best

Me and the Flintstones

rugby player the world has ever seen) I think rugby wins as a spectator sport. The continuous flow of action keeps you engaged and the tournament set up of seven players aside with two seven minute halves promised end-to-end action. You can also see who the players are since they're not wearing helmets or pads. Another cool wrinkle to the scene was that it was countries squaring off against each other, this was a first for me. You don't have to be a big fan of a particular sport to be a big fan of your country, so I didn't feel like a bandwagoner for being pumped after the U.S. beat Samoa or for being disappointed when they lost to Scotland the next day (I mean come on it's Scotland). Also, any contest where geopolitical events have an affect on which teams you root for and against is pretty awesome to me.

As the night wound down the English people next to me asked if I wanted to join them in going to Lan Kwai Fong (LKF). LKF is a location in downtown Hong Kong where the majority of the fans who were not in the stadium would be. It's three roads shut off to cars and lined with bars on each side in order to create a massive block party. Initially, I wanted to join them but I soon realized that I had drank too many liters and eaten too little food and the version of myself who had entered the stadium was much different than the version that I was at that moment. I decided, since I wouldn't be going to the stadium the next day, I would save LKF for Saturday night. I told my mates (see what I just did there? I used mates in a sentence I'm so cultured) that I would not be able to join them and went home.

I woke up early the next morning and got some breakfast, very glad with my decision to head home early the night before. Even though I did want to partake in the festivities of the weekend, I realized that spending the whole weekend partying would be a huge waste of a great opportunity to

Cool Building

check out one of the most famous cities in the world. I decided that I would spend the day walking around the city gettin' my tourist on. From everybody I've talked to who has spent extended time in Hong Kong I've heard one recurring description of the city: "It's like New York on crack!" I understand how somebody might say that but, having been to New York a few times myself, I don't think it's possible for any place to be like New York on crack. I made it my goal to develop my own description of the place by the end of my stay. I only had about day and a half to develop this description so the opinion I have is hardly one of an expert, but I still took it upon myself to try. One of the first things you notice, having spent the past two months in mainland China, is how capitalism punches you in the face, I was not at all upset about this. You look out in the street and you see Maseratis and Lamborghinis driving by. People wearing expensive suits walking into huge skyscrapers with bank logos on the top, advertisements for various restaurants, tourist destinations, and shows. It was also a breath of fresh air to see restaurants that I actually recognized (I've never been so happy to see a Subway before). Because Hong Kong was owned by England for quite a while there is a heavy British influence as well. Despite it raining for most of the day I came to the realization that I loved this place. It's exotic but westernized enough for people like me to feel comfortable, it's a bustling city but has tremendous scenery, and it's relatively clean but not sterile. At the end of the day the description I came up with was this: It's a blend of New York and London condensed onto a small, tropical Asian island where eastern and western values have been able to find some sort of middle ground.

Ground zero

After spending the day walking around the city I returned back to the apartment and rested for a few hours before heading out for my night at LKF around 9 PM. As I got out of the cab and began following the throngs of people toward ground zero I saw a bar that was playing "Sweet Home Alabama" (I'm not even a big fan of this song I was just surprised to hear it in a place like that) and was showing the kick-off for the Manchester United v. Aston Villa match.  Because I am a big Manchester United fan and live in a place where sports fans go to die, I quickly decided that the party could wait and went inside. It was a fun atmosphere as a lot of people were really into the match. It was a good

Shoddy camerawork

way to ease myself into the scene instead of immediately throwing myself into the gauntlet. After the match I paid my tab and carried on down the road. Eventually I made it. I have never been to Mardi Gras (or the state of Louisiana for that matter) but I imagine the scene was quite similar. I found myself in the middle of a street jam-packed with people all of whom where in varying levels of celebration mode. It was definitely the biggest party scene I've ever been to and something that I won't forget. I made sure to walk around the entire area and check out different places. There's really nothing new to add about actual bars themselves because bars are more the less the same all over
the world. All I can do is throw out generic adjectives like "fun" "crazy" "wild" "epic" or "convivial." It was a great night though.

"The NAKED truth about BARTENDERS is that they only FLIRT WITH YOU for bigger tips"

The next day it was time for me to leave. My plane flight wasn't supposed to leave until 9 PM but I wanted to make sure that I gave myself enough time to make it through 2 long subway rides and a round of customs and not worry about missing my flight. I left Hong Kong around 1 PM and made it to the airport around 5:00 PM. I had hit the jackpot that weekend and was living a charmed life that clearly wasn't sustainable. Sure enough, my luck ran out in the airport in a BIG way...

My first inclination that there would be trouble ahead came on my way to the airport. Storm clouds began to form that were so dark it looked like it was nighttime, even though it was only 3 in the afternoon. It looked as though one hell of a storm was about to hit Shenzhen and I began preparing myself for the possibility that my flight would be delayed. When I got to the airport I saw an unusual amount of people crowded around the departure screen checking what times their flights would be leaving. I had a lot of time before my flight so I decided to sit down and grab a bite to eat. The restaurant was pretty crowded and people were sharing tables. I ended up sharing one with a Chinese person who informed me that the planes currently taking off were planes that had been scheduled to take off around noon, it was about 6:30 PM at the time so I realized that I was going to be sitting in this airport for awhile.  It was also around that time that the skies opened up. It was one of the heaviest storms I had seen outside of a hurricane. Water was falling in buckets and the thunder and lightning was constant. It became apparent to me that there was a big possibility that my flight would be cancelled altogether. I sat at my gate for another 5 hours before I was informed that my flight was indeed cancelled. No big deal, I had prepared myself for this possibility. I would just grab a hotel in Shenzhen and inform my boss that I would be back a day later than I originally thought. I walked back to the ticket desk to try to get on another flight and inquire about nearby hotels. The scene when I got there was chaotic. There were many people who were in the same position as I was who were attempting to do the same thing. I wouldn't call the crowd in front of the ticket desk a line because lines seem to be a foreign thing to China, it was more just a mass of people trying to fight their way to the front. People were trying to box out the people behind them while at the same time trying to push their way ahead of the people in front of them. People were getting separated from their groups and getting pissed off and yelling at each other. I wanted to yell out that life doesn't have to be this difficult. It would have taken just as much time to reach the front desk if we had formed a line and would have been much less stressful. Finally, I made it to the front where I was told that the soonest flight I could get was in two days' time. Not only that, but downtown Shenzhen had experienced flooding which led to a water mane breaking and a large number of the roads were under several feet of water. Traffic was said to be in gridlock and I was advised to avoid going down there at all costs. The only hotel nearby was completely booked solid as well. At that point I wasn't sure what to do, so I called one of my contacts back at CLI and asked him to check and see if there were any trains heading to Guilin. After looking he saw that there was 1 single ticket left for a train that was leaving at 5 PM the next day, but that it was for the most expensive section on the train. I told him I didn't care how much it cost and to buy it for me promising to reimburse him. Looking back, that was the biggest stroke of luck I could've had. Given the desperate nature of the situation, there's no way that ticket would have lasted another 5 minutes unclaimed. I now had my ticket home but I still had to figure out where I would be sleeping. Seeing as how hotels were out of the question at that point and the weather outside was apocalyptic, I realized that my best option would be to stay in the airport that night. It certainly wasn't ideal but the airport had plenty of food and restrooms. I left the increasingly anxious scene in the terminal and found a place on one of the lower floors where I would post up for the night. I wasn't happy about my situation but I realized that sometimes with travelling these types of things happen. It's pretty much impossible to find sleep on a dirty airport floor so I decided that I wouldn't even attempt so that hopefully I could sleep on the entire ride

My accommodations for the evening

home. Things were relaxed until about 2:30 AM...then all hell broke loose...

As I was sitting downstairs more and more people began gathering around the ticket desk and eventually frustrations started boiling over. I soon began to hear tons of shouting and angry voices which soon manifested itself into a full-blown organized protest. I ran upstairs to see what was going on and what I saw shocked me. A huge mob of people had begun shouting organized chants about wanting to go home with one or two ringleaders firing everybody up. People were banging on the walls and the counters and the whole building felt like it was shaking. Instead of "Occupy Wall Street" this was "Occupy the Plane." I felt that this behavior was absolutely moronic, anybody with common sense could look outside and see that these were no conditions to fly in. Airline companies have certainly been a source of aggravation for me in the past but they can't control the weather; furthermore, if they're cancelling a flight because they can't guarantee the safety of their passengers, that should be viewed as a responsible decision. The scene got increasingly out of hand and some people began acting as if they were about to faint. I felt that this was way overdramatic seeing as we were in a terminal with dozens of restaurants and convenience stores. I just wanted to tell everybody to go buy some instant noodles, a pack of cigarettes, and to sit down and shut up. What were they hoping to accomplish? Even if somehow the airlines caved and readied a plane, there is still no way in hell I would have gotten on it. As if southeast Asia hasn't had enough airplane drama recently. All common sense had gone out the window as the mob grew. I went back downstairs and saw that many people who were asleep around me had gotten up and joined in the protest. Eventually the situation reached a point where policemen with riot gear had to come in and stand in front of the ticket desk to make sure that nobody did anything stupid. When I saw how out of hand the situation had gotten, my initial shock and annoyance subsided and I just started laughing. I began thinking to myself how crazy my life has been. In 24 hours I went from sleeping in a plush apartment in one of the nicest neighborhoods in one of the most expensive cities in the world, to sitting on a dirty floor, eating KFC in the middle of the night and watching a group of complete dumbasses attempt to turn the Shenzhen airport terminal into Tahrir Square. I can understand uprisings over a cause (gay marriage, abortions, saving the trees) but these people were essentially protesting the weather. I know I'm belaboring the point but even after I've gotten through the experience, it's still amazing to me. Unfortunately I didn't take any pictures of what was going on, the reason being is that it's generally frowned upon for foreigners to take pictures or videos of public unrest in other countries. Seeing how tenuous my situation already was, and the fact that there were RIOT POLICE (wtf???!!!) there I didn't want to make myself a target of anybody's frustration. I managed to capture a short audio recording but that was it. I know I'm complaining about it now but, looking back, I think having a scene like that occupying my attention helped speed up the waiting process for me more than if it had just remained quiet. This madness went on until about 6:30 AM. I then figured that the train station would be open and decided to start making my way over there. The trip back to the station took about an hour and involved another long subway ride and a cab driver who extorted me for 200 RMB by locking his doors and refusing to let me get out until I paid him the money. We argued back and forth for a few minutes but at that point I was so exhausted and was in no mood to involve police so I paid him (I'm still mad at myself for doing that). I called the man a couple American expletives then exited the vehicle (There are some really shitty people in the world). I finally arrived at the train station and got my ticket. The good news was that I now had my ticket out of there, the bad news was that I still had about 10 hours before the train left. If I had more energy I would have used that time to go check out the city (the part that wasn't under water) but by that point I was so tired and over my trip I just went to the lounge and sat there until my departure time; I also did not want to risk missing my train in any way.

It really is a shame that I didn't go see more of Shenzhen. It's supposedly a really cool city and located in one of China's Special Economic Zones, where more capitalist policies are allowed. There's supposed to be a lot to do and a lot of job opportunities but, simply from my own experience, I've come to hate that place because (aside from witnessing a riot and getting robbed by a taxi driver) I've always equated it with just being a stop off point between mainland and Hong Kong. As I sat in the lounge, I felt more like a refugee than a train passenger. I was reading a book when I looked up at the TV and saw that the news was covering the story of the chaos in the airport from the previous night. This gave me a pretty good laugh (and to think that at one point I thought that Hong Kong would be the most memorable part of the trip). Eventually, at around 4:30 PM a woman walked into the room with a megaphone and told us that we were free to board. I found the megaphone to be a bit unnecessary since I was in an area the size of a classroom with about 6 other people, but whatever. I boarded the train and 13 hours later (only about 2 of which were spent sleeping) I was finally back in Guilin. By the time I got home, it had been about 2 days since I had actually gotten quality rest and I looked and felt like a zombie. I then realized that I had an hour to get ready for school. I took a shower, shaved, and then set off to go shape the minds of Chinese youth.

This trip was a great stepping stone for me. In one weekend I experienced the very pinnacle and rock bottom of travelling. For someone like me I feel that this was very important. As a tourist it's always great to be able to witness famous attractions and once-in-a-lifetime events but, along with the positive, one must also be aware that things don't always go according to plan and that you must have a high threshold for discomfort and inconvenience. For every instagram picture of a pretty sunset or a beautiful city skyline there is also somebody at that same moment sitting on an airport floor in a foreign country eating KFC wondering what the next move is.

"Going Native" Experience of the Week

I guess watching the Chinese news in the train station...not too much to report on here.

Mandarin Improvement Sign

I didn't realize this until I got back to Guilin, but my trip home was the first time I had gone a full day where I spoke more Chinese than English. It was still very broken on my end and it was often hard for people to understand what I was saying but I made it.


Funny Sign of the Week

Litter, recyclables and WHAT?

Sign above the garbage receptacles in Hong Kong.



Reason Why I Like This Place

Sometimes you don't know what you have until it's gone. After spending my trip bouncing between two bustling cities it was nice to come back to a place where things are a little bit more relaxed.



Random Tangent

Don't get too excited Redskins fans, we should all have learned that lesson by now...


Thanks a lot to everybody who has been reading this blog so far. My last post put me over 1000 total views...I guess I'll press on.

Partytime

The subject matter of this week's post is one that I've told myself would never become an important theme in my writing: partying. The reason I've been so reluctant is because too often I see foreigners approach travelling as simply an international bar crawl. I find this unfortunate because I feel that spending your nights drinking and your days hungover is a great way to miss out on the numerous opportunities and experiences that are put right in front of you when you insert yourself in a foreign environment. Now before people who know me from back home begin accusing me of being a hypocrite, I will admit that I enjoy going out and partying as much as anyone (I mean, I was in a frat ok?). But, if there's one thing I learned from my college and fraternity experience (aside from, of course, being the best man I can be, that I can invent the future, and Jimmy John's sandwiches are garbage),  it's that you don't need to travel great distances to get drunk and act like a fool (tuition money well spent). So, armed with this knowledge, I have made a conscious effort on my part since arriving here to dial back that aspect of my life and focus more on the things that actually brought me here; but, dialing back doesn't mean cutting out entirely. I am a single man in my early twenties and I won't be able to meet girls if I stay in on the weekends banging out blog posts. I also figure that if I dedicate one post to the party atmosphere around here I'll never have to bring it up again, unless something totally out of left field happens. With this mission in mind, I sucked it up and spent this past weekend patronizing a few local Guilin hotspots, because sometimes in life sacrifices must be made for the greater good (in this case the greater blog post) . This won't be a comprehensive list of every cool place to go here, just what I've done so far.

Let me start by commenting on the local alcohol situation. There are several import stores around here where one can buy nice beer, wine, and liquor and most convenience stores sell American Budweiser but, the local alcohol selection leaves something to be desired. If you're looking for the cheapest way to catch a buzz you're faced with three options:

1) Liquan beer (Lee-chuan)-This is the most common beer available at convenience stores. You can buy it in a can or a large bottle equal to about 2.5 cans. Considering that its the cheapest beer in a country not well known for producing good beers, it should come as no surprise to you that people drinking these are usually aiming for quantity over quality. I've also heard from more than one person that the Liquan company puts formaldehyde (embalming fluid) in their beer (I guess to preserve the taste maybe??) I'm not sure if I believe that it's actually formaldehyde but something is definitely sketchy about a beer that is 3.6% alcohol and has a distinctive, non-watery taste. Best not to think about it.

2) Baijiu (Bye Joe)-Hooooooo boy, this stuff is for people who really like to live on the edge. It's a clear rice liquor that tastes like a mixture of vodka and gasoline. I'm still not quite sure if this stuff has any business being in a human body. It's not uncommon to walk around here and see groups of Chinese men sitting at tables drunk off their asses and chain-smoking with several of these bottles sitting on the table and no chasers in sight. These people aren't messing around.

3. Great Wall-Not much to say here. It's a cheap red wine designed to be distributed en masse. I'm sure wine connoisseurs would hate it but I can't say that it's the worst wine I've ever had. There's this stuff called Franzia...

So, given these three choices (or an import if you decide you would rather pay extra because you want to avoid waking up with sharp pains in your stomach), the move on the weekends is to normally find somebody's apartment to hang out at and drink a bit before hitting the town and seeing where the night takes you. Once the decision is made to head out, there are a couple choices:

1. The International Youth Hostel- This hostel is a place where travellers often stay when just passing through. There's a cool lobby inside with a bar and lots of tables and couches. This isn't a place to go and get rowdy but it's fun to go with a smaller group of friends. One of the things I really like about this place are the people you run into. You often hear some pretty cool stories when people are explaining to you just how they came to be in this part of the world.

2. Cats and Rabbits- Located across the street from the hostel, this bar is probably the most popular place for foreigners living in Guilin to go out to on a weekend night. Even though just about all the employees there are Chinese, there's usually western music playing. They will also have the occasional band come through. I feel that foreigners like CnR because it has become a familiar place in an unfamiliar environment. It's small enough to where you can walk in and expect to see some recognizable faces and hear some recognizable songs but not so familiar that you'll forget what country you're in (and if you do forget, the bathrooms will certainly remind you). 

Bush isn't too popular here

 3. Muse- What is Muse? OMG only the hottest nightclub in town. I don't think I've ever come here

before midnight. If you're trying to kick things up a notch, this is the place you would go. Immediately upon entering Muse, one is thrown into a bizarro world full of strobe lights, lasers, and exotic dancers. The main room is about 50x40 yards with two stories of rented out booths for large parties surrounding a main stage area where people go to dance. Periodically throughout the night they will clear the dance floor and put a quick "show". These shows have a pretty wide variety. In the past I've seen everything from a hired performer singing popular Chinese songs, to Ukrainian women putting on a fashion show (I'd rather not think about how they came to be in Guilin but I'd be lying if I said I've never speculated), to a bunch of dudes wearing women's clothing and dancing in a suggestive manner (things can sometimes get a little weird). But, Muse is a place where, more than many other places, I have reaped the benefits of my foreign-ness. The booths in this place are typically rented out by local Chinese people who are having work parties, birthdays, bachelor parties, etc. I'm not sure what the exact prices of these booths are, but I know that they're relatively expensive. What Muse does in order to make reserving one a bargain is to match the price of the booth with alcohol. Because alcohol around here is so cheap, it is not uncommon to walk around and see people sitting at a table with beers stacked into pyramids which are unlikely to be entirely finished. Since I'm such a rare specimen, oftentimes I get waved over by people sitting at these tables to come hang out. I realize that it probably has less to do with them actually wanting to hang out with me and more to do with them wanting other people in the club to see that they hang out with, presumably rich, foreigners but I'm OK with that (plus if they
took a look at my bank account they would see that the joke is on them).

I've been told from several extremely unofficial sources that there are certain Chinese customs that govern the behavior of a person playing a host. One of these customs is that, as a host, if your guests do not leave drunk and happy you have failed at your duties. The reason that I bring this up is because I get the feeling that this custom has been applied to me several times while at Muse (with varying results). Whenever I sit down at one of these booths I immediately get all kinds of beers, shots, and cigarettes shoved in my face as well as people wanting to play drinking games. The rate at which all of these get put in front of me would not be considered a sustainable pace for somebody who wants to hang out for awhile, so I usually need to tell people to slow their roll a bit. Since clearly I'm not from the area many people are interested to hear about where I come from and other things that interest me. I've had conversations ranging from the NBA to Batman to the Ukrainian crisis (and yes the last conversation was brought on while watching the Ukrainian fashion models). A couple weekends ago I had somebody ask me to teach them the rules of "Rock, Paper, Scissors." I thought it would be a fun thing to show them for a few minutes...but man did that game take on a life of it's own. After teaching a couple people they, in turn, went and taught some of their friends and soon enough we had a full-blown RPS tournament on our hands involving around 20 people where the losers had to take shots. This lasted for

forty five minutes!!! I have never A) played RPS as a drinking game and B) played for that long. I eventually had to throw in the towel and remove myself from the situation so that I wouldn't get sick. Who knew that RPS, in addition to being an effective conflict resolution method, could be such a strong symbol of globalization (and intoxication). To borrow a quote from the Dos Equis guy: I do not always go to Muse, but when I do, It's always interesting.

Muse bathroom sink

"Going Native" Experience of the Week

I now have an official account at the local Guilin bank, an official address, and an official permit to work in China...life is weird.

Mandarin Improvement Sign

Sitting and watching the NBA playoffs with the owner of the local coffee shop and talking about basketball.

Funny Sign of the Week

Hungry but don't have enough time for a meal? Try some little black biscuits

Not sure why I think this is so funny but it is.

There's a couple funny parts to this one. In addition to reassuring the customer that a human body is capable of digesting these, the makers have also clearly ripped off the "Ritz" logo. 

Reason Why I Like This Place

You can sleep anywhere:

No this man is not dead, he was breathing when I walked by (or at least he appeared to be). There were other people curled up on the sidewalk nearby but I chose to take a picture of this person because he had chosen what looked to be the most uncomfortable position. Seeing as that he was wearing khakis, a belt, and a button down shirt I don't believe that he is homeless either. 

Random Tangent

As the World Cup draws near (June 12th) and soccer fever makes its customary once-every-four-years sweep through the US we will once again hear the age old hypothetical question: What would happen if the best athletes in America played soccer? (What if we had a team where Adrian Peterson was our center back, Allen Iverson was a winger, and Chris Paul was a center mid?). I agree that fielding a team full of physical specimens could potentially help, but, what the casual US soccer fan does not understand is that the deficiencies in our national team have nothing to do with athleticism. We already have the most athletic team in the world (and if we don't we're at least in the top 5). Our forward Jozy Altidore will be one of the most physically gifted players on any team this summer, but he is no where near being considered a world class player. How do you think Lionel Messi would do at an NFL combine? Xavi? Pirlo? Rooney? Altidore would destroy them in any physical test but, when it comes to soccer, he barely belongs on the same field as these guys. What makes these guys so good is that they have tremendous footwork and they can read the game. Their soccer IQ is through the roof and they can kick a ball into a net as if they were born to do it. This is exactly where the US falls behind. This isn't a weakness that can be solved by bench pressing or broad jumping or running a fast 40 yard dash. The best teams in the world are organized and smart and are able to make an inferior team chase the ball around for 90 minutes. Teams that rely on athleticism may be able to upset a team here and there but they are ultimately doomed in a tournament where you are required to play multiple games outdoors in the summer time. If strength and athleticism were the most important assets to have in soccer why is the Spanish team better than the big, bad Germans? Why has an African team (considered to be among the fastest sides in the world) never won a World Cup? If we're going to try to give off the impression that we're a soccer-mad nation for the next month let's also give off the impression that we at least understand the game. Go USA!

Hong Kong

My first trip outside of Guilin took me to Hong Kong...for about 45 minutes. In order to organize

my thoughts on this adventure I will divide my story up into sections:

1. Preface--For those of you who haven't experienced it, the process of entering a country on a tourist visa with the intention of obtaining a legal work permit while you are there is sketchy, to say the least. This is the process I am in the middle of right now. In order to enter China I had hoped to obtain a multiple entry visa which would be valid for one year and would allow me to stay in the country for up to 90 days before having to leave and reenter. I received my yearlong multiple entry visa but, due to some issues with the visa office, my maximum length of stay would only be 30 days instead of 90. Translation: until I get my work permit I need to leave the country every 30 days and reenter or risk getting booted out. Despite the fact that Hong Kong is technically recognized as part of China, its designation as a "Special Administrative Region" means that going through customs there and returning to China would qualify as "leaving the country"...even though the Chinese government considers Hong Kong part of the country (this all makes perfect sense right??). In order to get to Hong Kong I would need to purchase a train ticket to the city of Shenzhen, once there I would need to go through customs, before getting on another train that would take me into Hong Kong. The train from Guilin to Shenzhen would take about 13.5 hours, then, after customs, the train into Hong Kong would take me another 45 minutes to an hour. My school was paying for my trip so, in order to show good faith, I was going to try my hardest not to miss any school time for this trip. To do that, I would have to leave Friday night and try to return by Sunday. My parents had also sent a package with all of my nice clothes to their friends in Hong Kong, which I planned on picking up during my brief stay and bringing it back with me. In a nutshell, I was travelling all the way to Hong Kong to pick up a box then turn around and come back. To put this trip in perspective: my plane flight, which took me halfway across the world, from Detroit to Beijing took me around 12.5 hours; getting to Hong Kong would take about 14...and I was doing it twice in one weekend. Fun stuff.

2. Preparation--Going into this trip, I prepared for the worst. I've had too many bad travel experiences to assume that things will ever go according to plan. Whatever philosopher argued that humans are in control of their own destiny clearly had never been to an airport or a train station before. These are places jam-packed full of people, none of which actually want to be there, who are either waiting in lines they don't want to be in, paying for tickets they wish they didn't have to pay for, sitting in departure gate chairs they don't want to sit in, and/or eating snacks they don't want to eat. All in hopes that the weather outside allows them to reach their destination in time with all of their belongings intact. Tickets to me are just pieces of paper with arbitrary times written down in order to make you think that everything will go according to plan. My first step was to go to the train station and buy these tickets. I went by myself and, because of my limited Chinese, stood through two wrong lines before I finally figured out the right one. After buying my tickets I learned that I was supposed to arrive in Shenzhen at around noon on Saturday and my return trip would leave at 5:30 PM that same day. This time frame seemed doable at first (provided that these were the actual times the trains would be arriving and departing), but take away the two hours that it would take to get to and from Hong Kong, the amount of time it would take me to get through two separate rounds of customs, and how long it would take to find the building where my package was. I realized that I would be cutting it close and began preparing myself for a longer stay than I had anticipated. My supplies for the trip: my local phone, iphone, ipad, hand sanitizer, mouthwash, toothbrush/toothpaste, deodorant, change of clothes, roughly 300 USD in cash, and enough melatonin to put an elephant to sleep. Because both legs of my trip are overnight rides the tickets I bought included a bed. While this may sound luxurious and comfortable, the tickets were for the "hard sleeper" section which are basically a series of bunk beds (hence the large amount of melatonin). Also, if these beds were anything like the others I've slept on around here, the mattress would be a rock. This would not be an ideal way to spend a weekend but it was still preferable to getting deported, I guess.

3. The Trip-- My train was scheduled to leave at 10:30 on Friday night so that gave me some time to go out and eat a MASSIVE dinner after school (I wasn't sure when my next meal would be so it felt necessary) and then go back to my room and pack. I arrived at the train station an hour before the departure so I could make sure to load up on water and snacks. Soon enough, the time came for me to board the train. I paused for a moment to take a deep breath in order to prepare myself for the experience I was about to have, then I stepped on. The hard sleeper section consisted of a narrow walkway with enclaves off to the side where the beds were located. There were six beds in

My bed

each section with three on each side. The space between the sides wasn't even as wide as my shoulders. The three beds were separated into top, middle, and bottom. I soon realized that on these trains you either want to top (more headroom) or the bottom (bedside table and storage room underneath the bed); the middle (which had neither) was what I had. Climbing into the bed was awkward because I didn't want to step on the bed below me or grab the bed above. I wasn't planning on wearing my shoes in bed but I also had nowhere else to store them so I had to wedge them between my mattress and the wall. I laid down and laughed to myself as I listened to the conductor tell everyone to "get comfortable" and prepare for the departure. My plan was to read until about 1:30 AM, then take my melatonin and see how long I could fall asleep. Things went more or less as planned and I nodded off between 1:30 and 2. The sleep wasn't ideal but I was ready for that (anybody who expects otherwise would be kidding themselves). There was a toddler in the bed below me who seemed determined to stay up and chat all night, also, the train would stop every couple hours at other stations which would also wake me up. I was awake for good around 9:30 the next morning due to a searing pain in my right shoulder that felt like I had pinched a nerve because I slept on it wrong. This pain would last

Border between mainland and HK

the duration of my trip, wonderful. Despite the pain in my shoulder, I felt relatively well rested when we arrived in Shenzhen around noon. I disembarked and followed the signs towards Hong Kong customs ready to take on the next challenge.

My experiences with customs have varied; sometimes it's a five minute breeze, other times an hour long ordeal. This time, my customs experience entering Hong Kong would end up being the worst part of my trip. As it turns out, there are a lot of people who like to go to Hong Kong on the weekends who would've thought? As I got closer to the customs area, the hallway I was walking down became increasingly crowded until I found myself crammed into a space that clearly wasn't meant to hold that amount of people. The idea of forming a line is something that appears to be foreign to Chinese people and this was no exception. I stood for close to 30 minutes shoulder-to-

Customs line from hell.

shoulder with people in a space so tight I couldn't bend my knees. As somebody who has a particular dislike for lines as well as mild claustrophobia, these 30 minutes were my own personal circle of hell. I finally broke through what I thought was the last of it before I found myself at another round. This round was where I would have to declare that I was going specifically to the island of Hong Kong (as opposed to Macao). This section wasn't as crowded but it did take precious time away from me. I arrived at the train going into Hong Kong at 2:30 PM. I had three hours to get into Hong Kong, retrieve my clothes, come back, go through customs, and make the train. Certainly doable but everything would depend on how quickly I could find the building where my package was. I had an address but I didn't know which subway stop would be the closest. My parents' friends who had my package were both out of town and told me they would leave it with their doorman. I planned on calling them but neither of my phones had service. I would have to go it alone. Getting on the subway I felt like I was in "Mission Impossible." I'm sure some of you have felt the hopeless feeling of riding on a subway while being in a big hurry. You stare at the map and constantly count and recount the amount of stops before your destination, the whole time feeling

Road in Hong Kong. HAHAHA get it?

like you are in a car that has hit every red light it comes across.

My plan once I arrived on Hong Kong island was to get off at the first station I could and take my chances with the car traffic and hope my cab driver would know where to go. I got off and grabbed the first cab I saw and showed him the address (Most locals in Hong Kong speak Cantonese so I didn't even want to attempt to pronounce the street name, Mandarin is hard enough.) After looking at the address the driver absolutely gunned it. I've had some crazy cab drivers before but this was the first time where I actually appreciated it. It was clear that I was somebody who wasn't from the area and he could have easily taken a longer way in order to drive up the fare (which a lot of drivers do) but not this man. It was as if my desperate energy had somehow rubbed off on him. He dropped me off at an intersection and sped away. I surveyed the buildings around me hoping that I was in the right place. I asked a person on the road if they knew where the address I had in my

Location of my box

hand was, they pointed in a general direction and I began walking. Eventually, I saw a building that seemed to match the description I had. I entered the lobby of the building, still not quite sure if it was the right place. I walked over to the front desk but nobody was there. I then looked down to my left and saw a box sitting on the ground. I walked over to it and saw that it was mine. It's hard to put into words the sense of relief and accomplishment I felt as I picked it up. Seeing a box with my name and U.S. address on it after having been through a thirteen hour train ride, a hellish round of customs, three subway connections, and a cab ride so that I could arrive in a building that I had never been to, located in a city that I have never lived in, was a crazy feeling to me. I couldn't help but smile and laugh because, despite everything I had gone through to that point, things actually had worked out for me. My trip was only halfway over and I wasn't out of the woods yet because I still had to get back to Shenzhen and through customs again to make my train. I was exhausted at that point but the adrenaline rush I got from finding that box made the cab and subway ride a breeze for me. Going through customs coming back took about half as much time as coming in and I made it to my train with 45 minutes to spare. When I entered the train I stored my luggage and sat down. I felt like Walter White after blowing up Tuco's office (5 minute mark). As I sat in one of the seats by the window and watched as the train moved through remote parts of China that I would probably otherwise never see, I was so content and happy with myself that I didn't even care how much my shoulder hurt, or how hungry I was; I didn't even mind the fact that I was stuck with the middle bunk again. Sleep would be a lot easier to come by on the way back. 

train tickets

3. Conclusion: I know what you're probably thinking, "That doesn't sound worth it at all!" I agree,

the whole trip truly sucked and I hope to never have to do that again. I had experienced sleep deprivation, exhaustion, claustrophobia, annoyance, and, most prominently, doubt. Not just doubt that I wouldn't make it back for my return trip, but doubt over the decisions I had made that put me in this country and in this situation. Nobody should have to go through that just to retrieve a box of their own personal belongings (I also ensured that I wouldn't get deported, but still) however; it's because of how much it sucked that I will always look back on that weekend with fondness. I felt more alive throughout that whole experience than anything I've done in recent years, I plan on keeping those train tickets forever.

Anybody who has ever sucked at golf knows what a bad round feels like. It's an uncomfortable and highly frustrating experience that isn't over quickly. It can cause you to lose your composure and question why you even wanted to come out in the first place. But sometimes, just when you are about to give up, through divine intervention or some miracle of physics, you will knock a 150 yard approach shot within a foot of the hole and tap in for birdie. When the round is over, that is the only shot you are thinking about. That is what keeps you coming back. Finding that box and making my train was my 150 yard approach shot. It was an unexpected victory in a trip full of defeats. It's these victories that make travelling like crack to me and keeps me coming back for more.

Speaking of coming back for more, I will have to make this trip again. Next time I'll make sure to stay longer.

"Going Native" Experience of the Week

Becoming a regular at the coffee shop down the road from CLI. One of the real bummers about living here is that coffee isn't nearly as popular as it is back home. The American office culture of drinking coffee by the gallon in order to make it to 5:00 and not have a conniption fit when stuck in rush hour traffic doesn't really exist. That void is filled largely by tea. Coffee here is looked at as more of a fancy drink that people will sit down and enjoy during their leisure time, because of this coffee tends to be a bit more expensive. However, with my job being what it is, if I don't show up to work with an energy level that at least matches that of my students I'm pretty much screwed. So, having reached the ripe old age of 22 and not being a big fan of tea, old habits die hard. There is a restaurant next to my house back home that I would go to just about every Sunday morning (as well as some Thursday, Friday, and Saturday nights) that I miss dearly, so it's nice to have a place here that I can walk into and be recognized by the person who works there.

The Encounter Cafe

Mandarin Improvement Sign

While it was admittedly a struggle, I'm going to count successfully buying train tickets as a sign of improvement. My goal walking into that building was to leave with two train tickets and I achieved that, despite standing through two wrong lines before finally figuring out the right one. Go me.


Funny Sign of the Week

This is a pack of condoms....

Reason Why I Like This Place

I really enjoy the "family-style" of eating. It makes dining out a more shared experience. Instead of the western practice of everyone having their own personal plate and having mundane conversations like "How was that sandwich?" "It was pretty good, how were those peas?" eating out has a more Thanksgiving-like atmosphere. Because I haven't been here very long I've eaten out with a lot of people I don't know very well, so anything that can stimulate conversation is something I welcome.

White people feast

Random Tangent

As many of my friends back home know, I am a lifelong Red Hot Chili Peppers fan. The first song by them that grabbed my attention was "Otherside" off their album "Californication." I remember being drawn to what I'll describe as an "upbeat and fast-paced smoothness" to their melodies. Despite being a fan of them for so long, I have never been to a concert of theirs...one of the biggest failures in my life. The closest I've come is being denied an autograph by their newest guitarist Josh Klinghoffer, easily a top ten moment in the past 22 years for me. Seeing how they're advancing in age and probably won't make a tour stop in Guilin any time soon, there is a possibility that I may never see them in concert. Due to this disappointment I've decided to take in upon myself to construct what, for me, a perfect concert set list of theirs would be. Right off the bat I know that this could never happen because my ideal concert would include now-departed guitarist John Frusciante, one of my favorite musicians. One rule I made for myself is that, in order to capture the full scope of their evolution over the years, I have to include a song from each of their albums since their beginning in the 80s. I know this is rather self-indulgent but it's my blog and my concert so anybody who has a problem with that can take a walk.


SET 1 Evolution: I'd like the first set to be dedicated to showcasing their range of sound and the evolution of their music from the early 80s to where they are now.

1. Deep Kick (One Hot Minute)-It may seem strange to begin the concert with an odd song like this but I chose "Deep Kick" because it is the story of how Anthony Keidis and Flea first met as kids and the beginnings of their band. Also, I think the beginning narration that morphs into one of their upbeat jams is a good way to begin a show.

2. The Adventures of Rain Dance Maggie (I'm With You)-Their most recent hit single. If we're going to travel backwards in time to their beginnings it's important to begin with where they are now. You can also never have too much cowbell.

3. Charlie (Stadium Arcadium)-Continuing backwards with one of their funkier songs from Stadium Arcadium.

4. Venice Queen (By the Way)-Underrated song showcasing Frusciante's unique guitar style.

5. Otherside (Californication)-Definitely need to include the first song of theirs I heard in this section. I like the slow build up that takes place throughout the song until it finally erupts towards the end with another face-paced riff by Frusciante.

6. Aeroplane (One Hot Minute)-Seen by many to be the crowning achievement of the Dave Navarro era--there weren't many.

7. Suck My Kiss (Blood Sugar Sex Magik)-Hit song from their first album in the 90s decade. You can sense here that they're beginning to channel their wilder energy into something more cohesive and coherent than their music from the 80s.

8. Taste the Pain (Mother's Milk)-Their first album after the death of their original guitarist, Hillel Slovak, and the subsequent quitting of their original drummer, Jack Irons. Gave everybody a first glimpse of their current drummer Will Ferrell, excuse me Chad Smith, and John Frusciante. The most popular song played from this album is "Higher Ground," but I'm sick of hearing it so this is my selection.

9. Fight Like a Brave (Uplift Mofo Party Plan)-A power ballad with an easy chorus that the crowd can sing along with.

10. Brother's Cup (Freaky Styley)-Early rap/funk fusion song reflective of the musical tastes of funk legend George Clinton, who was their producer for this album.

11. Get Up and Jump (Red Hot Chili Peppers)-Aaaand we've arrived at square one. This is their first hit as a full band. Taking place back in their raw cock-in-a-sock days. What they lack in adequate song writing and musicianship, they more than make up for in energy.

SET 2 Quirks: In this set I would like them to show some of the recurring themes they include in their music, as well as any extra talents, bonus tracks, covers, or solo projects.

12. Around the World (Californication)-One of the genres that Anthony likes to incorporate into his vocals is rap. There are many instances where, in my opinion, this turns out horribly. but "Around the World" is a song where this rapping is at harmony with the instruments accompanying it.

13. Did I Let You Know (I'm With You)-Flea is one of the best bassists in history but this song gives him a chance to show his skills with another instrument he enjoys: the trumpet.

14. Ah Yom (The Empyrean)-My favorite song of John Frusciante's otherwise bizarre and ill-advised attempt at a solo career. He does have a good voice (when he's sober) and I'd like to see him demonstrate that live as a lead singer.

15. Purple Haze (The Jimi Hendrix Experience)-With his funk/rock and roll fusion style of music, Jimi Hendrix was a major influence on the Red Hot Chili Peppers at the beginning. They have already saluted him by covering his song "Fire" but I would like to see them cover "Purple Haze." I think the song fits in with their style and it's always fun to hear classic songs in a different way.

16. Quixoticelixer (Bonus)-My favorite in a long list of extra songs that weren't released into albums. Although "Quixoticelixer" was recorded with "Californication," It wasn't released until 2006.

17. Soul to Squeeze (Bonus)-Slowing it down with a more country-sounding song. Recorded with Blood Sugar Sex Magik, it was released by itself as a single. The chorus of this song was one of my quotes in my senior high school year book so it's going in here.

SET 3 Hits: Songs that appeal even to the casual fan, ones that everybody knows and what they are famous for today.

18. Californication (Californication)-My favorite music video ever.
19. By the Way (By the Way)
20. Dani California (Stadium Arcadium)
These three songs are included together in this order specifically because they are meant to be a trilogy about a fictional girl named Dani (Teenage bride with a baby inside-Californication, Dani the girl singing songs...-By the Way, Dani California-Dani California). They're all good songs too.

21. Scar Tissue (Californication)-Slower song from my favorite album of theirs. The slide guitar is pretty cool too. COME BACK JOHN!

22. The Zephyr Song (By the Way)-My favorite song by the Chilis has changed a few times but, as of right now, this song is holding down top spot. It epitomizes everything I like about this band (especially the guitar solo at 2:08).

23. Snow (Hey Oh) (Stadium Arcadium)-A not-so-subtle allusion to the bands past history of drug addiction. It's a song that everybody likes but hopefully not a song that everybody can relate to.

24. Give it Away (Blood Sugar Sex Magik)-Their most played song in live performances, makes sense to save this one for last.

ENCORE

25. Can't Stop (By the Way)-Upbeat pace with a title like "Can't Stop," this song was made for encores.

26. Under the Bridge (Blood Sugar Sex Magik)-Perhaps their most popular song ever written.

So here we are, the extent of my fanhood boiled down to one concert.